Check This Out

I stopped off at the grocery store on the way home from work today....

Note to Self: being able to tell people I was done for the day and buying food when they still had two hours left at work = good; being stuck in line behind housewives, retirees, and the woman who, apparently, was in charge of her church's cookout = bad. (She had two shopping carts completely full of carrots, lettuce, tomatoes, celery, potatoes, onions, and charcoal lighter fluid.)

.... I had plenty of time in line to peruse the magazines, candy, and impulse items strategically placed alongside the checkout line. Observation 1: I did not recognize any names nor faces of the celebrities on the magazine covers. (This is merely independent confirmation that I have dropped off the face of the earth.) Observation 2: Since when are bags of cotton balls an "Oh yeah, I almost forgot!" item? Observation 3: One mainstream women's magazine touted "The 10 Things Men Crave in Bed". Now I want sex as much as the next guy, but how much do you want to bet that "sleep" wasn't on that list?