Arnold Ziffel meets Twisted Sister

Happy Chinese New Year! Robomarkov provided me a link to the Chinese zodiac, which has one symbol per year for twelve years, rather than the typical zodiac, which has twelve symbols in one year.

In polite circles, I am a boar, but this particular web page calls me a pig. As with most horoscopes, some of it seems true, some is inaccurate, and some could apply to anyone. Let me know how much of this you think fits me.

Occupying the last position in the Chinese Zodiac, the 12th, the Pig symbolizes such character traits as diligence, compassion, and generosity. Pigs enjoy life and because they are entertaining, others enjoy their company. Pigs are giving souls and reap much enjoyment when they’re helping others, but sometimes they give too much. Honesty is what Pigs give and it’s what they expect to receive in return.

Pigs seek peace and will do what is necessary to maintain it. This trait, while admirable, sometimes makes it easy for others to take advantage of Pigs. Pigs are always doing for others, helping anyway they can, but rarely will they ask others for help. This can overwhelm and stress them, but Pigs don’t mind.

When it comes to money, Pigs enjoy spending more than saving. They gravitate towards name brand items. Thriftiness happens only occasionally, but Pigs do know how to find great deals.

Always seeking fun, Pigs often indulge more than they should. Excessive eating, drinking and smoking can cause sickness. Pigs aren’t very active and, combined with their excessive behaviors, cause them to gain weight. Pigs are social and being alone makes them unhappy. Pigs would benefit from adopting a healthier lifestyle.

Pigs enjoy helping at work and can always be counted on. They enjoy opportunities that allow them to express their creativity. Pigs are detail-oriented, a trait admired by management. Pigs aren’t afraid to take on responsibility. Some good career choices for Pigs include: entertainer, caterer, doctor, veterinarian, or interior decorator. They’d do well in retail or hospitality.

Supportive and giving, Pigs make great partners. They’re affectionate and sexual and prefer staying home to going out. They enjoy what they have, especially their home and family. Once they find the right partner, they’re typically committed for the long-term.

This particular web page also asks the year of your birth, so it enhances your sign with one of the five natural elements. I am a "metal pig".

Metal Pigs have a tough exterior, and this strength can be seen in all areas of life. They work diligently and love with all they have. They’re outspoken and trust others right away.

For some reason, I picture myself as a real pig with a wig like Dee Snider of Twisted Sister, except with black hair, to contrast with my pink pig skin.