Who Wants to Know?

My friend Betty has posed some questions to me, which is some sort of blog tradition that gets passed around, much like those What Animal/Superhero/(insert genre here) Character Would You Be?-type quizzes. As this appears to be a serious, meaningful tradition, I cracked open a beer and sat out on my veranda to ponder my answers.

What book have you most recently finished reading?
Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire (although I have five other books in progress).

What reasons, if any, do you have for believing that you are not actually a brain in a jar hooked up to an incredibly realistic computer simulation?
Because too many things go wrong. Notwithstanding Microsoft, things would be perfect or almost so in a simulation. Even if someone were to deliberately program snags, snarls, and snafus into the simulation, could they possibly think of so many? Two good retorts would be, "What reasons, if any, do you have for believing that you are not actually inhabiting a planet created by a divine being?" and "...that you are not an integral part of a planet-sized computer programmed to determine the ultimate question to life, the universe, and everything, to which the answer is 42?"

What's your favorite currently-airing TV show?
Hmm, what TV shows do I watch that are first-run and not syndicated or on DVD? "I haven't watched TV since Green Acres went off the air." (Magdalena Yoder, in a series of mystery novels by Tamar Myers) Plus, nearly everything I watch I have taped to view at a more convenient time. Here's the rather short list of "currently-airing" programs I watch. (Note: some of them are on during the summer only, or have shorter "seasons" than typical American shows, but since they're first-run, I've included them.)
General Hospital
Mystery
Dr. Who
Aggie Almanac
Psych
Monk
60 Minutes
Generally, more channels means more programs, which means it's easier to get tripe on the air (especially on Food Network), so it's harder to find quality series. I actually prefer A Prairie Home Companion on public radio. (Thank heavens you didn't ask me about movies!)

What one piece of horticultural advice would you most wish to impart to those of us with black thumbs?
Boy, just one? I came up with four, so I combined the first two into one, and the new second one is kind of a corollary of the first. Well, they're short (no treatise here), so I'll post them all anyway and risk getting disqualified.
1) Start off with inexpensive plants. That way, if they die, you won't have wasted much money. Note: avoid buying plants from national chains/franchises. The reason their plants are so cheap is that they purchase on a national basis, so everyone in Alaska, New Mexico, Alabama, North Dakota, and Massachusetts will buy the same plants, whether they'll grow in those states or not. (Heck, you can't even get one species that's happy in all the different ecosystems within New Mexico.)
2) Look around your town to see what grows. If everyone else can keep it alive, so can you.
3) Ask your friends for divisions or offsets of their plants. (And I'm not saying this simply because of the baby Agaves I'd like to clean out of my planter and see if they'll survive in your yard.)

Describe your evil Mirror Universe twin.
May I say "Baines"? :) Seriously, my twin would have the following characteristics that I either lack or which I have and could be dangerous with if I knew how to apply them better.
Intent and ability to abuse power and charm
Self-confidence
Intimidation
Daring/go-getter
Lack of guilt/conscience
Ego/indifference toward others/lack of altruism
Inquisitive/curious/experimental
Memory for truly useful stuff
Bigger team of useful friends
Of course, by describing this person, I am also aware of his shortcomings and how to plot his downfall. :)