A Waste of Time

I have barred myself from eating out for the time being (except my weekly cheesesteak). My checking account took a serious hit, what with the gift cards for my employees and my airplane ticket to NM coming at the same time, so I'm going to stop all frivolous expenditures until it recovers.

It would be easier, though, if I had a microwave. I mean, that way, I could actually fix myself something more than a sandwich because I'd have a way to reheat the leftovers. I have myself a quest!

What is your name?
Captain Chlorophyll.

What is your quest?
To find an inexpensive microwave... and a rubbery, yellow raincoat.

What is the air speed velocity of an unladen swallow?
I don't know, but the formula is here.

I wasted a good amount of time on Saturday driving from thrift shop to thrift shop. (I didn't waste all my time, though, as I got a cheap pair of sneakers from K-Mart and the Dr. Pepper that was on sale at Dollar General, which were errands I was able to do while on my quest.)

I visited five thrift stores (would've been more, but two appeared to have closed down since the phone book was printed) in the greater Noog area (to include Fort O.), and none of them had a microwave. Does no one give away useful stuff any more? I suppose most people nowadays would just throw out a broken microwave and buy a new one, instead of seeing if it could be fixed. But what about when they feel theirs is "too old" and just want a new one? What about when Grandma or Old Aunt Ethel dies and the heirs have to dispose of her household goods? (However, if you're in the market for an electric bread machine, go for it. There were dozens of them on the shelves.)

One of the stores actually had a raincoat -- and it was yellow! -- and it was rubbery! -- and it even had reflecty bits on it! Alas, it was a size medium, and I require at least a large, or an extra large, to accommodate my gorilla arms. (Um, that means extra long, not extra hairy, in case you were wondering, although... Um, let's not go there right now, okay?)

The good news is that, if you're looking for a men's suit, you can pick one up for only $8. I used to think that $100 was a good deal on a suit, but that was ten years ago, and the last time I wore a suit was when my father died, but eight bucks is a steal!

Okay, so I didn't buy a suit I don't need, and I didn't even buy those three owl figurines, even though they were just a dollar apiece. (If I'm not allowed to eat out, then something to sit on a shelf and collect dust is even more of a superfluous expense.) However, I did weaken and pick up six books (fifty cents each at two stores and a dollar each at another). The guilt there is that it feels just as wrong to pay nothing but fifty cents for a book as it would to pay just eight bucks for a suit.

Oh, and when you die, Betty, will your books to your sister or a library or someone else who would appreciate them. (Maybe the Tech library will name its science fiction wing after you.) Don't let anyone take them to a thrift store, because they seem to be the depositories for some of the most useless books imaginable (although it appears that someone once read them). Your collection is far more worthy than that!