Now let's write about television.

I just got done watching the latest Mystery! episode which I taped last night. (Okay. I confess. I watched the new episode of Scooby Doo! Mystery Incorporated and then turned on my computer to blog about Mystery!)

It's a new series about Sherlock Holmes -- and I do mean "new". It's set in current-day London, and Holmes (Benedict Cumberbatch) is all about texting. Watson (played by Martin Freeman, whom I recognized from the Britcom Hardware) is fresh back from combat in Afghanistan (the more things change, the more they stay the same). Mrs. Hudson and Inspector Lestrade are there. (Both actors look slightly familiar, but I'm not going to bother looking up their past roles to see if I've actually seen them or not.) 221B Baker Street looks very similar to the Jeremy Brett version -- but which is not the actual location, which I visited on one of my family's British Isles trips. (It's an office building.) We also get introduced early on to Sherlock's brother Mycroft (and Watson apparently has a gay sister named Harriet) and the presence of Moriarty.

That's where my main problem is with this series. When the host of Mystery! (whose attitude strikes me as supercilious, so I dislike him) said that it is a current adaptation, I told my brain to set aside instant dislike of the show because it wasn't traditional. It turns out that I disliked the show exactly because it tried to stick in some of the traditional points, and they stuck out like a sore thumb from all the new stuff.

There were a couple laugh lines for me, and more than a few I noted were trying too hard to be laugh lines. Some points were made too obvious on camera, but I appreciated the subtitles used whenever text messages were received. I also recognized the writing style, and some of you might, too. Let me give you a few hints. 1) The lead character is extremely skinny. 2) The lead has a sidekick. 3) The lead likes to confuse said sidekick by speaking incredibly rapidly, so that the sidekick won't realize that the lead is spouting illogical garbage. (3b-and so rapidly that replaying the scene at a louder volume doesn't help me understand it any better) 4) The lead has an almost encyclopedic knowledge of almost everything (which, Holmes fans know, is most assuredly not accurate). 5) The lead shouts, "Brilliant!" 6) There are so many convoluted, contrived moments that it's disturbing. 7) The cinematography (can I call it that, if it's on TV?) enjoys showing bright lights against a dark background (but can't carry off true chiaroscuro) and long shots of a very tiny point of focus (but that might just be because I watch an "old" TV). 8) It surprises me that neither Betty nor Fred has blogged about Sherlock yet because they are familiar with the writer. (Then again, maybe they knew ages ago that he was going to write this, so they were warned off and didn't bother watching.)

Give up? Okay, other than Betty, who is raising her arm and shouting "Oo! Oo!" a la Horshack (and Fred, if he's reading this), give up?

The episode was written by Steven Moffat, former writer/producer of Doctor Who.

All right. I'll admit that I liked the hook: serial suicides. However, let's put in a #9 and say that Moffat doesn't know when to leave well enough alone. I coined the phrase (which isn't very popular, so you won't recognize it), "More isn't always better." Moffat keeps adding a pinch of this and a dash of that and.... Well, you know what he's calling it, and you know what the base ingredients are, but it sure doesn't have a very palatable taste.