Anhydrous Wit

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Monday, April 26, 2010

Take me out to the ball game.

On Friday night, I attended a Chattanooga Lookouts baseball game. (They're the AA minor league team for the L. A. Dodgers.) The first half of the game was utterly boring, with a vast number of foul balls, mostly over the third base line -- except for the one that went straight back, over the net, and right through.... the open window of one of the sky boxes -- so I spent a lot of time musing. For instance, I've never understood why foul balls aren't considered "hits". After all, the bat connected with the ball, didn't it?

The opponents for this game were the Montgomery Biscuits. Biscuits? Cheering for a Lookout (named after nearby Lookout Mountain) is bad enough, but could you ever admit to being a professional Biscuit? (I thought I was at a baseball game, not a biscuitball game.)

The team answered my first question even before I could ask my companions (Froggy and his "not wife"). Yes, the team has a mascot: Looie the Lookout (the one on the far left in the picture). He has a certain charm, but his expression never changes, and he's not very spontaneous (visible only when the announcer says he's doing something), so the Philly Phanatic is still my favorite mascot. Looie was joined in this game by Blooie, a very short (I couldn't see him when the little league team was with him), blue version of Looie. In his honor, the Lookouts are (according to the announcer) the only baseball team to have a three-and-a-half inning stretch, in which Blooie leads the crowd in singing half of "Take Me Out to the Ball Game").

After the game, we were treated to a pretty nifty display of fireworks, set off from two trailers pulled onto the warning track in the outfield. (That reminds me: I need to phone the grounds manager there and see what the falling cinders and ash did to his turf.) As they were getting set up, we listened to some music over the loudspeakers. I was kind of bopping along to one song when, all of a sudden, most of the crowd loudly sang, "Sweet Caroline -- bah, bah, bah". I never knew Neil Diamond could pull people together like that. Or maybe it's a post-game tradition there.

Prices at the concession stand were surprisingly reasonable. I paid just $2.50 for a generous portion of soft-serve ice cream (vanilla/chocolate mix) served in a little, plastic, Lookouts cap, like the Slider sundae at Ground Round. (I have quite an extensive collection of those caps.) Other foods were also comparatively inexpensive -- for ballpark concessions. Game tickets range from $4.00 to $8.00 (not counting senior or children's discounts), which is much better than the $10.00 I would have shelled out at the Chattanooga Locomotion game I skipped on Saturday (if they even had it) because of the day-long thunderstorm. However, if you want a souvenir, forget it. I thought of buying my friend Gimpy a Lookouts cap, since he already has an Albuquerque Isotopes cap, but I didn't want to spend $24.00. (Yikes!) He can probably find a better buy on E-bay.

The announcer said that it was a sold-out crowd of over 6,400 people. Funny, that, what with all the empty seats I saw. Of course, just because people buy season tickets doesn't mean they go to every game. They're so affordable ($4.00 for general admission is actually a dollar cheaper than I paid at the parking garage, and if I don't mind walking a bit, I could find on-street parking somewhere for free) that I might go back this season.

It was a fairly quiet game. Except for one time the crowd booed the Biscuits' pitcher for deliberately walking the Lookout player, they clapped respectfully for good plays and were utterly polite. Of course, I'm basing that comparison on my experience at Philadelphia Phillies games, and Philadelphia phans are among the rudest in the country.

Oh yeah. The Lookouts beat the Biscuits 6-1.

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