Three times don't make me no lady!

If I die this weekend (or at least become ill), you'll know it was something work-related that did me in.  (And, if I don't, it wasn't for lack of trying.)

First off, I got a faceful of water from one of our sprinklers.  You don't think that sounds so bad, but you don't know that the water comes from an untreated retention pond.  I was wearing my safety glasses, and I don't think I got any water in my nose or mouth, but who knows what malignant microbes might be scurrying through my bloodstream as I type this.

Second, I was pawing through some Liriope (locally called Monkeygrass), looking for a sprinkler we suspected was in there and being blocked by the vegetation, when the middle finger of my right hand found part of a broken beer bottle (or a broken part of a beer bottle, but the former is more poetic due to its alliteration).  I think I cut my finger very near the edge of my fingernail.  I went to the school infirmary, washed my hands, and the blood (what little of it there was) had disappeared.  The nurse applied hydrogen peroxide (which did not sting, as she warned me it might) and put on an adhesive bandage.  She suggested that soaking my finger in salty water would loosen the dirt beneath the nail, so I wouldn't have to dig with a nail file (or whatever those things are called).  I tried that after I got home from work, but it didn't seem to do a thing.  The salt water didn't sting, either, so I'm thinking that my cut must not be too deep.  Still, who knows what malignant microbes might have been on that broken bit of bottle or in the dirt on my fingers?

Third, I was heading to the facilities office so that Thing One could call in my incident report (note:  our company stupidly will not allow me to phone in a report on myself, even though I am the manager), when someone was about to run a stop sign in the crosswise direction because he was on his cell phone.  Was it a student or parent or teacher?  No, that would be too easy.  It was Officer Krupke, the head of campus security, whom you think would know better.  (Yet another reason to disparagingly refer to his staff as campus insecurity.)

I figure I can use this afternoon as a learning experience in determining what weaknesses (if any) the great hero Captain Chlorophyll (able to leap tall mushrooms in a single bound!) may have.  Besides, "Captain Chlorophyll and the Case of the Malignant Microbes" sounds like a winner.