The verdict is in.

I know I've been kind of boring the past few months, but that's the sort of life I lead. I'm content to stay at home and read, rather than experience the wider world. It doesn't make for great blog content, but I got off my duff on Saturday and did something you'll (hopefully) enjoy reading about.

Actually, I started Saturday by not going out. While I was walking my early morning laps, I was planning my day. As the sky lightened, I realized that it would be a waste of time and gasoline (not to mention my state of mind) to drive all the way to Hixson and discover that the three thrift stores didn't have microwaves. Instead, I would just phone them and ask! (You could call that my "dawning" realization.) It was a good thing I did, too, because none of them had a microwave.

I heated the steak and mushroom pie (see the previous post) for lunch. It turned out not to be like the pot pie I had imagined it to be. There was no gravy nor any vegetables, and the beef was sliced, not cubed. The crust was very flaky and made a mess all over the plate. The flavor was okay. It was nothing special, though, so I don't think I'll bother purchasing one again, unless the steak and banger one (maybe this coming weekend) is better.

On Sunday, I had kielbasa and some of the farmer's cheese, Russian style pierogies. The kielbasa had too much black pepper and wasn't smoky enough for my taste, but the texture was good, and the casing was firm but easy to chew. (The ingredients list didn't say, but I'm assuming it was "natural" casing, and the less said about that, the better.) The pierogies had good initial flavor but a sour finish. I don't think I'll buy them again. I still have to try the sauerkraut (Russian style) and potato cheese (Polish style) ones.

Saturday afternoon, I joined a few of my Wednesday night league members for "nine-pin no-tap" bowling with some of their friends and some students from UTC. (For readers who don't know, if you knock down nine pins with your first ball, it's counted as a strike.) I was teamed with Keeli and Brandi (and, let me tell you, when I was in college, none of the girls was that skinny, and, even though I've had a decade to get used to the idea, I still find facial piercings unattractive), so the rest of us, by extension, became Captaini (Captain), Carli (Carl), and Jimmi (Jimmy). My scores were better than average (202 and 222), and I had my first "perfect" game. (In my book, that means all spares or strikes, not a 300 game.) It figures it would happen outside of league play.

It took nigh on forever, what with five people on each team, so several of us had to skip the third game so we could get to the restaurant on time. We ate at Hampton's Vaudeville Cafe, one of those dinner theaters where you try to figure out who the murderer was. Our performance was "Mystery at the Nightmare High School Reunion" (kind of fitting, since I didn't attend my own 20-year reunion this past autumn).

Our group was so large (over 20 people), they sat us on the floor tables, right in front of the stage. If you're family sized, don't worry about getting stuck in one of the booths in the back and missing anything important, because the actors roam around the whole audience, interacting and (supposedly) dropping clues. However, those of us in the front could interact more with the performers (we got them off script twice -- once which an actor admitted out loud -- but they were excellent at ad-libbing), and we often roared with laughter at comments which the microphones didn't pick up. Also, the bubble machine was right above my seat.

The stereotypical cast included the overbearing football coach, the nerd (who looked remarkably like Johnny Galecki's character in The Big Bang Theory and was dressed as a Redshirt from Star Trek), the class clown (who resembled Larry, the Cable Guy), the artist (dressed and made up more like a metal or punk rocker than an artist), the class president (doubling as the class brain and who remarkably resembled Velma from Scooby-Doo), the uptight teacher, and the dumb blonde/prom queen.

After the murder, there also was a stock Southerner with about eight names (Billy Jim Bo Bob...), bad teeth (oh, did we pick on him when the wife in the anniversary couple announce that she works at a dentist's office!), and a mullet (the hairstyle, not the fish), who got his first laugh by turning around and letting us see "Soddy Daisy CSI" embroidered on the back of his jacket. (Definitely an inside joke you get only if you're a Nougat or live near The Noog.) His job was more of a stand-up comic, and -- Beware! -- if you go to this place for your birthday or wedding anniversary, he will call you up on stage.

The food was buffet style Italian, which you served yourself before the show started (though you could return for refills): an iceberg lettuce salad with grated parmesan cheese, ziti with cheese in tomato sauce, meatballs in tomato sauce, some sort of rice, and chicken breast with red and green pepper slices. The ziti and the meatballs were pretty tasty, but the rice and the chicken were blah. (I did note that the various dishes were in separate trays, so diners could keep kosher.) Dessert was a slice of ordinary chocolate cake which was brought to the table later on, during the performance. A server brought refills of water, iced tea, or sodas, but you're safer to stick with tea or water. The Dr. Pepper I ordered was constantly replaced with Coke; sure, the servers had to refresh a lot of beverages, but they'd be a lot safer not assuming.

No, I didn't guess the murderer correctly. Nor did I figure out the motive. I didn't even guess who the victim was going to be -- although I came close to guessing the method before it happened. The character who also was the murderer didn't say much at our table, and another one skipped us entirely, so, obviously, I couldn't solve the mystery because they withheld clues from us. Oh yeah, they also sang a few times.