Anhydrous Wit

Are you pondering what I'm pondering?

Friday, May 20, 2016

Too Much Thinking, Not Enough Doing

Work has been a little hectic this morning, but when I took a bathroom break, my mind was able to ponder other things, things such as this.

Could we call a thick liquid -- that is, one with a high specific gravity, such as molasses or glycerine -- a "thiquid"?

Monday, May 16, 2016

Smile! I'm Not on _Candid Camera_.

One of the office security cameras points right at my desk.  I often feel self-conscious because of this, even when I know I'm not doing anything wrong.

The other day, the office manager commiserated.  "I don't like them, either.  That's why you see me unplug them every morning."

I feel more at ease now.  I think I'll pick my nose.

Wednesday, May 11, 2016

A Word to the Wise

For those of you college graduates who haven't landed a job yet, here's some interviewing advice from the real world.

1) If you wish to remove your nose ring before the interview, do it before entering the building, not in front of the interviewer.

2) After removing your nose ring, do not shake hands with the interviewer.

(The applicant was barely out the door as the interviewer rushed to wash her hands.)

A Minor Anniversary

I have received my 26th biweekly paycheck from my employer.  Have I been here a year already?  (I guess I like my job, or else I would've asked, "Has it been only a year?")

Thursday, May 05, 2016

Recycling My Vote

For all you Americans out there who are disappointed in the presumed "major party" candidates in the Presidential election, I'd like to remind you that there are more than two choices.  The Libertarians and Greens usually have a candidate on the ballot.  Does the Communist party offer a candidate?  I think I remember seeing a Free Soil candidate once.

No, you will not be "throwing away" your vote.  You are voting against candidates who don't represent your views.  (Even if you don't agree with the "minor party" candidate you cast your ballot for, it's not likely the person will be elected, so it's not like you caused any true harm.)  You are exercising your Constitutional right.  At the very least, you're earning the bumper sticker, "Don't blame me.  I voted."