Anhydrous Wit

Are you pondering what I'm pondering?

Wednesday, October 31, 2018

In Which I Am Crude

I arrived at work a short time ago.  One of the story headlines in today's newspaper in the break room read, "Lottery creating game tied to sports".  Before reading the article, I figured it was about a new scratch-off game.  (Based on what I've seen at gas station counters, lottery scratch-off tickets tend to have themes.)  A natural for a sports-related one would be "Scratch Your Balls".

Tuesday, October 30, 2018

Stop. Just... Stop.

My blogging ideas used to come when I first woke up.  Sometimes, things happen to me during the day, and I share that.  Today is kind of a blend of the two.  I'm at work, but my brain is idle.  (If you have nothing to do, at least look busy.)

I started pondering if I could make a successful business out of lawn decorations.  I might call it Yardart Enterprises (as in "yard art").  Of course, it would boost my business if I sold all sorts of flower pots & planters as well.  I could call it The Pots Spot.  My advertising slogan might be, "Stop at the top Pots Spot," or maybe, "Opt for The Pots Spot:  We're the tops."

Friday, October 26, 2018

Across the Pond

I, and coworkers, have caught myself cursing in English every so often.  Apparently fairly often, I say, "Crikey!"  Just the other day, I caught myself cursing the "bl**dy" computer.  How long have I been doing this?

Then, this morning, the radio announcer read a news story about the current state Attorney General choosing not to appeal a decision in a case brought by Marcy Britton against former Attorney General Bruce King.  My brain interpreted what it heard as "Britain" and "King's office", and I immediately argued, "They don't have a King.  They have a Queen," before I realized I had misconstrued what I heard.

I might as well hop on a plane to London right now.